Protected: Sleep Paralysis – Victorian Edition

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My Dream Spaceship

I had a long drawn out dream this morning that, unfortunately, I cannot recall the beginning of. It woke me up at approximately 4 in the morning and I had a huge urge to write it down. And I should have. But with 2.5 hours before I had to get up, going back to sleep won the battle. For Me, in the battle of  Anything vs. Sleep, Sleep ALWAYS wins.

At the end of the dream I was leaving work (but not where I really work in real life) with an unknown female. It was dark out. As we reached our cars I spotted a couple of red dots in the sky. They were blinking and darting about oddly.

Let me stop here and say that B and I saw these very dots in the sky when we got home from grocery shopping the other night. We watched them for a while, but because we live close to an airport and an airforce base we decided it was an airplane or something. It didn’t move like an airplane at all, though. And it was on my mind for a few days. By yesterday I had all but forgotten about it, though.

So I saw these lights in my dream, but they darted about more wildly than when B and I saw them in real life. Then, before my eyes a very large spaceship appeared from within the sky. It was like it had been cloaked somehow, except for the lights, and now the cloak disappeared and the ship came into focus. Time stood still as everyone in the parking lot stopped and looked up at it in awe and wonderment. I was not afraid. Not one bit. Just in awe. It was breathtaking!

I could not begin to tell you the dimensions, but it took up at least a third of the sky we could see above us. And it was higher than trees would be, but not terribly far away. Maybe half a mile in the air? I don’t know. It was a dark grey color, with lines etched into it (perhaps doors and hatches, etc.). As I looked at it, it was slightly curved on the left side and had 3 points on the right side. Kind of like a drawing of a sideways tulip, only taller and thinner. In each point there was etched a circle, and in each circle was etched a different design. I remember in the dream becoming aware that I wanted to memorize all the details and began desperately trying to. All I remember now is the circle on the point closest to me was etched like it had bicycle spokes. Maybe with a circle in the center. I couldn’t help but think how beautiful it all was.

All I can say is that I woke up suddenly after this. But I wasn’t afraid. On the contrary, I was delighted and happy and filled with awe and wonder! I woke up my husband saying, “I just dreamed I saw a spaceship!”

I know it sounds weird, but it felt comforting. It felt like home to see it! I know that sounds crazy, but that’s how it felt!

Protected: Strange Dream

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Protected: SP episode – Swine Flu Edition

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Theory on my last post

…I think the “It” was Swine Flu? (Or, potentially, whatever has unleashed Swine Flu on us?) This dream was Wednesday night/early Thursday morning. I didn’t hear about Swine Flu until yesterday (Sat.) so don’t tell me I dreamed it because I was worried about something I heard. That isn’t the case. My dream started in a school (from what I remember) and as a resident of NY state, well, that’s the closest outbreak to me – a school in NYC. There was a scene in the dream that took place in “South America!” – may have been Mexico. By the time I wrote this one down the details were fuzzy. The final scene took place with my husband and I more or less locked down in our apartment (though he forgot to lock the door!). A quarantine? Staying home because we all had to? Yeah, I do think this may have been another prophetic dream for me. It hurts that I have these dreams, but they are hard to figure out, and even if I could I cannot do anything about the crisis at hand anyway! I hope this flu thing doesn’t turn out as bad as my dream felt.

They’re Coming?

So, I should be out with my husband whose band is playing an open mic night as I sit typing. But, I am so exhausted I couldn’t bear to go out. I had a nightmare last night that woke me up about 4 a.m. in a state of frozen anxiety. I had only slept a few hours before that and slept fitfully after. This ruined my day.

The dream has faded a bit, but it was intense enough that I wanted to share it. Just to get it out there. Ever since my prophetic dream the morning of the  9/11 attacks I’ve tried to be more careful about recording what goes on in my head during the night. I can’t do anything about it, but it’s interesting to see if things come true. And most of the time, I’m hoping to god they don’t.

Let me start by saying I didn’t read or watch anything scry last night, or eat any weird food before bed (though when I woke up I was starving). My memory of the nightmare starts with my husband and I hiding out in a high school with some other people. There was discussion of “Them” being on their way with an unmitigated understanding that “They” were extremely dangerous and would not think twice about slaughtering us all. I was under the impression “They” were terrorists of some kind, possibly even aliens. I’m just not sure. Whatever “They” were, we were terrified of “Them.” I recall finding a place to hide in the gym.

The dream suddenly cut to me sitting with a childhood friend in a diner or restaurant in South America somewhere. I don’t know where, I just knew it was South America. Still afraid, still thinking something was out there. I also remember commenting on how blue her eyes were – I think she was wearing blue contacts.

Next thing I know I am watching a baseball game. A critical one. I feel like I am there facing the pitcher. The pitcher was someone who I recognize to be a major league pitcher in real life, but for some reason his name escapes me, although I want to say his name involves “Benito” or “Benitez” and he’s terribly scary looking. A tough guy. The eyes of the world are on this game, for we are still under duress from some kind of threat, and a compromise has been made with “Them.” If the pitcher could throw all strikes they would stop their attack. Or something like that. Tension mounts as our pitcher throws great throws, but he finally throws a bad one and all hell breaks loose in the stands as “They” begin attacking all the fans. Even Oprah gets a boot to the face! At this point, the scene pulls back and I see I am watching it on TV in our apartment with my husband. We are terrified and locked down waiting for “Them” to attack us where we live.

Our neighbors start making noise in the hall (in the dream). I get up to investigate and when I look out the peep hole I realize my husband never closed the door all the way, let alone locked it. At some point in this dream we had been trying to sleep in our bed. I am beyond pissed that he was so careless and tell him so as I close and lock the door.

I woke up breathless, terrified, filled with anxiety, unable to move (frozen with anxiety) and unwilling to even look to my right. After several minutes of telling myself it was just a dream, turning over, etc. I could not shake the terror. This is quite unusual for a non-sleep paralysis episode for me. I woke up my husband for comfort. I never got over this dream. Hence, I’m writing about it 18 hours later as I sit here, afraid to go to bed because my husband’s not home.

I hope “They” aren’t really on their way.

Profound Dream

I woke up terrified from this dream this morning. I’ll post the dream as I remember it first and then explain the imagery and what I think it means.

I am getting ready to go on an overnight trip with some friends. We are in the driveway at my Mom’s house. Mainly I remember this guy, Matt being there. He’s the singer in a friend’s band and is pretty eccentric. I am very preoccupied with a pet parrot my mother has outside – telling her how to take care of it and everything. I get into the car and suddenly realize I forgot my pillow. I kinda freak and beg them let me go get it, but before I can persuade him, Matt slowly and accidently smashes the car into the fence at the side of our driveway (our driveway bends in an L shape). The fence shakes hard, but does not break or fall – just comes loose. My father (who in reality passed away two years ago) is within sight in the side yard. I am certain he is going to freak out. I calmly ask Matt to back out slowly and park on the street, I will go take care of this. He parks and before I can get out, Dad tears by us in a fit of anger, gets on a motorcycle parked behind us and speeds away. I am certain he is very upset. I get out of the car and go in (possibly with the pretense of getting my pillow and) to talk to my mother, who is now in the upstairs bathroom. My husband is suddenly there and tries to follow me up the stairs, but I ask him not to. It takes three tries for him to understand me. I go directly to the bathroom, stand in front of the window overlooking the driveway and proceed to reiterate this entire event to my mother. In the middle of doing so, my father comes back, still angry and carrying a paper bag. He goes in the house. I wake up before he gets upstairs.

This was a tough one! I woke up utterly terrified, as if I had a sleep paralysis episode. I felt like something was in the room. Dreams containing my father feel very profound to me. I don’t know if it’s my imagination or if his presence after death just is so special to me it feels like it must be profound. I don’t know. I do know I think I figured this one out. There are a lot of symbols that helped me.

It’s been over two years and I have had a terribly difficult time getting over my father’s sudden death. A parrot in a dream can represent someone eccentric in your life. My friend Matt is also eccentric. It may seem strange, but I am certain both the parrot and Matt represented Me in some way. First, trying to explain to my mother how the parrot (I) need nurtured and then plowing into the fence.

I forgot my pillow in my dream but desperately wanted to get it before venturing out. I dind’t want to be uncomfortable. I wanted to take care of myself. This is a breakthrough…

The fence represents my depression and inability to come to terms with my father’s death. I have made some strides lately, and I feel like I am making some breakthroughs (taking care of myself/”pillow”), so this fits nicely with the breaking the fence idea. I have a lot of work to do by a long shot, so the fence is not smashed or fallen down yet.

I was always afraid of disappointing, upsetting or hurting my father. Also, I have been afraid that feeling better means forgetting my father and I fear that, too. In the dream, I was afraid Dad would be mad over the fence smashing. This makes sense, metaphorically in more ways than one, then. I don’t want to hurt him, if he is indeed somewhere out there still, by moving on past his death. I also fear losing myself or my memories if I let go and move on with my life. I am also afraid of that kind of pain being experienced ever again in my life.

Dad getting on a motorcycle stumps me a little. He definitely didn’t do this in real life. Motorcycles represent freedom, so it does go with my theme. He was angry when he got on it, though. Maybe, again, I am angry, distraught or confused myself about the freedom of not fearing Life After Dad? Or I feel Dad is going to be upset with me for this?

I go inside – telling my husband to stay downstairs. This is easy – I need to get past this issue myself. It is only inside me and only I can fix it.

I see my mother standing in the bathroom. Bathrooms represent cleansing of the self and renewal. She has been doing a great job getting on with her life. I am finally meeting her there. We discuss the situation and glance out the window to see Dad come home, still angry and carrying a paper bag. According to this site looking out a window  in a dream means:

To dream that you are looking out the window, signifies your outlook on life, your consciousness, point of view, awareness, and intuition. You may be reflecting on a decision and seeking guidance.

Have I finally, subconsciously decided the time is upon me to start healing? Yes, I think so. Am I afraid of the “baggage” of my father’s death coming back and overwhelming me? Absolutely.

This dream makes a lot of sense after all.

October 14, 2008? WTF is going on?

Alright, I’ve had a migraine on and off – mostly on – since later Friday night. it is now Sunday and not showing signs of letting up. Migraines for me are not unusual, but one of this duration is pretty much rare. It’s not been excruciating. This is of the functional variety. Functional but tiring. Just weird. I have been writing it off to the stress at work last week and possible hormonal fluctuations (just started my off week of bc pills). THEN, I got the urge – totally unrelated – to check the Unexplained Mysteries board to see what’s going on over there, as I haven’t looked at it in a while. This is a forum on the paranormal and the unexplained.

For a while now I’ve been telling B that I feel like something big is going to happen. I feel weird. I can’t explain it except to say I don’t feel ”myself” and I feel very “off.” As you know, I’ve been to several doctors and have come up empty thusfar. I have had some psychic abilities in the past that I have never been able to harness or control. In short, the biggest example of this is Sept. 11th, 2001. The night of Sept. 10th I was very sick to my stomach for no reason I could figure out. My stomach was way off. I really don’t want to discuss it right now, but the last dream I had the morning of Sept. 11 before I woke up was a very vivid, lucid dream in which I was walking to & arriving at work in what I recognized as lower Manhatten (I dont actually live there) and experienced what I can only describe as an epic disaster. In retrospect, I am sure it was the perspective of some unfortunate soul in the second tower.

So I’ve had some experience with feeling weird and having things happen. Things I have no control over. But big things.

I don’t know what to make of the info I have found today. Info on 10/14/08, motherships, Google Earth anomalies and weird lights on the news during the VP debate the other night. Read all about it here and in a number of different threads here.

I mean, I know it all sounds like a load of hooey. But so would have 9/11 before it really happened! What really gets me is this blog where a known psychic named Blossom Goodchild is channeling info from the “aliens” (I guess) and posting it. If you read the entry for Friday 10/3 you’ll see them discussing how our people are suddenly experiencing headaches. Yeah, this really made me stop and think. Clearly, I’m a sensitive. Clearly, I have a headache. Hmmm. This and the google earth anomalies are also being discussed here.

Maybe I’m wrong, but I don’t think this is a “cult” thing. Even if it is, I am NOT part of any cult and never would be. I just think this is all interesting and definitely weird. I’ve discussed before the increase in paranormal events within the last year and what it all could mean.

So, just WTF is going on in this world? Hmmm.