So much mystery…

Originally posted 08/14/2005

…Anyhoo, last night I found that my bruise went best with my black Motley Crue Dr. Feelgood sleeveless tee acquired from the sale rack at Hot Topic. Lest you think I’m one of those morons that dresses head-to-toe Hot Topic, um…no. I prefer to peruse the sale rack more or less bi-weekly. I almost never buy anything there at their ridiculous original pricing. And it’s usually a band tank top of some sort. Very rarely anything with “grommets” or “buckles” or sh.t like that. I use Hot Topic to enhance my wardrobe – not as a closet for god sake. I hate those people!

So the Crue top enhanced my blood-giving bruise very nicely. I think Everyone should have a bitchen bruise to offset the perfection of their skin. It’s like a built-in piece of jewelry.

I had two separate Sleep Paralysis incidences this week that were very extreme. In the first I was having a normal dream when suddenly I became conscious and thought the cat was walking on the bed (he really wasn’t in the room and the door was shut). Then I felt the pressure of someone sitting on me and could hear voices chattering around me. I started to panic but couldn’t scream. I looked over at Brian and could only see his hands gripping the blanket in terror. I finally woke up out of breath and in a panic and Brian was….asleep. I was so frightened I couldn’t calm down and had to wake him up. I ended up bawling like a baby for a half hour before I felt better. Doesn’t this sound pleasant?

The other incident was the very next night. I wasn’t even asleep yet, just trying, when I fell into a hallucination. I was lying on my stomach and felt someone -something- climb on top of me and lay on the full length of my body. I started to panic and a female voice said in my ear something ridiculous like “Cowboy (guy’s name I can’t remember) loves the (something else I can’t recall)” and then this sinister giggle. I yelled “WTF? Get off me!” and thrashed to try to throw the…entity…off me. I heard more chattering and giggling and just felt evil and darkness all around. Then I finally woke up. Upset, I woke Brian up again and freaked out. I know it sounds so crazy. But it honestly feels like someone or something is f.cking with you. Two nights in a row was really hard. I just kept thinking “leave me alone! please leave me alone!”. So I don’t know what this is. They can say all they want about it being a part of the brain that is unexplored. Maybe that’s it. But it sure feels more sinister and dark when you’re experiencing it. It is SO REAL. My words can’t even properly convey it. I don’t care how insane I sound. They were very real experiences. I hadn’t eaten anything weird. But I was very tired (especially the second night) and had a very stressful week.

Whoa, this post turned unfun! Guess I’ll shut up….